You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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