just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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