He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
