Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize