i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
