Whatcha textin bout Willis?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
