I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
