She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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