I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
