my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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