We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
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