I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
