it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
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