i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
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Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
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I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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