Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize
