we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
