Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
