pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
