dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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