it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
sex in a hospital.. check
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
