We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
cat food counts as protein by the way
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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