I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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