DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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