Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize