..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Operation Purity has been aborted
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
