someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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