does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet