i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?