I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
if only i could text you this smell
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Enjoy the penises