too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
