Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
