i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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