All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
