I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
