Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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