im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize