Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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