College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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