she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
