I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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