My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
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