Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
