school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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