awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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