I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
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I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
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Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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