That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
