My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize