It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Randomize
