I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
