I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
