You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
