You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize