Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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